Saturday, May 30, 2015

"Who Are You?"

      The Posse of Angels is starting today’s newsletter with a question, “Who Are You?” and they wish you to take a few moments to answer “I Am ______" and fill in the blank.
     
     For some of you, the answer will come easily and there may be others who will pause before responding. When I have posed the question, “Who Are You?” to my clients, their answers have been as varied and unique as their set of fingerprints. Many clients chose to finish that sentence by stating their profession i.e. I am a teacher, I am a lawyer, I am a nurse, I am retired etc. Others responded by stating their relationship status i.e. I am a grandparent, I am married, I am a stepfather, and the one that I heard countless times from women, I am only a housewife and a mother; as if being a housewife and a mother was not of great importance.
     
     And then there were others who when asked to answer this question, actually started to well up with tears and they found it very difficult to respond as they stated that they did not know who they were.
 
     
     This past week, I had a beautiful new client who broke down during her session and told me that she had lost her identity and needed help in finding out who she was. After marrying, it was discovered that her husband was ill and throughout their marriage she cared for him. In addition to nursing her husband, she had been quite busy with fund raising. With the passing of her husband several years ago, she no longer was his caregiver, and she had stopped all her fund raising activities.  When I asked her, why she thought that she had lost her identity, she said that when people find out she no longer works or does anything, she feels that people are judging her.
 
     
     
     And if you have physically lived on this Planet within the past 200 years, and that includes all of us, then you have lived being programmed by the energies of the Piscean Age. This past Age was one of logic and reason; viewing ourselves solely through the eyes of concrete justifiable rational evidence. Things like our titles, certifications, and qualifications determined who we were, and whether we were someone of substance, worth associating with. One could say that the quote, “I do, therefore I am”, would be representative of the Piscean Age.
      With the cross over into the Age of Aquarius, we see each other through very different eyes. The importance of degrees, what college we attended and our grade point average all hold less sway compared to a person’s energies of love, unity and harmony that they hold in their hearts.
 
     
      When the Posse of Angels heard that she thought others were judging her, they shared that she would be surprised how very little time others spent thinking how she chose to live her life. And they were quick to add that this was more a matter of human nature, rather than a reflection of her worth and value.
She then replied, “You know, when you first asked me, ‘Who Are You?’ In that moment, I thought about saying that I am a painter because I love to paint, but you know, I am not very good at it.”
     
     The Posse of Angels was quick to reply, “When did determining our 'I Am' get caught up with whether we consider ourselves to be proficient at something. For instance, someone may look at a Picasso and be in rapture as they extol his genius. And yet someone else who does not fancy viewing women painted as dogs with three breasts, may not be as complimentary. Our tastes in Art are very personal and subjective, and so it is with determining our perception of 'Who We Are' and our self-worth.
 
     

     I remember living in New York City in the early 80’s as my ex husband accepted a job at a Wall Street Law Firm. This was the decade of the Super-Moms who leapt tall building in a single bound, climbed up the corporate ladder with the baby on their hip, and wore power suits while cleaning their spotless homes. They simply did it all. Having the choice whether or not to work, I chose to devote all my time to raising my daughter. With my ex being new to the firm, I was looking forward to attending a cocktail party to introduce the new influx of lawyers. Standing in groups, drinks in hand, we were introduced. One of the impeccably dressed women lawyers asked me what I did. I enthusiastically gushed and exclaimed how much I loved taking care of my 2 year-old daughter and all the fun mommy, toddler things we did together. While I was speaking, I saw the invisible shutters come down over her eyes, as she yawned and looked at her watch. Glancing over the room, she interrupted me in a distracted tone, “That’s fantastic, you must excuse me.” as she could not escape quick enough. Feeling the sting of being judged and not good enough because I did not work, I cried myself to sleep that night.

     
     This feeling of not measuring up ate away at my soul so much that I vowed that if I ever had the chance, I would say something very different when someone asked what I did. I would show others that I was worthy and deserving of being someone.
    
      Well, the next opportunity came with a formal dinner party in the spring. All dressed up, I was well rehearsed with what I was going to say. And when I was introduced to someone and they asked me what I did, I proudly said without hesitation, “I am a classically trained pianist.” which, by the way was correct as I was given classical music lessons throughout my childhood and also as a teenager. Suddenly, this person in front of me came alive, leaned forward and said, “I absolutely adore classical piano, what is your piano of choice?” Thrilled that he was engaged in a response, I replied,  “I love my antique 1901 Steinway baby grand.” which was also true. And then it was like the floodgates were opened as this lawyer enthusiastically shared, “ There are many out there who say Bosendorfs and Bechsteins are the Rolls Royce of pianos, but I am in complete agreement with you, as I too love Steinways. Did you see Alicia Dela Rocha play Rachmaninoff’s 3rd piano concerto at Carnegie Hall? The way she married the dark shades and the light shades of the piece…. well it was sheer genius and I would almost say the best performance ever, if I had not been treated to the Russian genius Evgeny Kissin’s brilliant interpretation with the National Symphony Orchestra when I was in Washington DC litigating a very, very important case. Of course, and I might be dating myself, but I did see Horowitz when I was a young boy……” and he continued on and on scarcely drawing breath, not allowing me to get a word in edgewise. He was mesmerized by the sound of his own voice; hearing himself pontificate and extol his extensive knowledge of classical music.
       
     As the bell chimed for us to move into the dining room, he took my hand and shook it profusely and said, “It has been such a pleasure speaking with you, and I can’t remember when I have had a more enjoyable conversation.” Watching him walk into the dining room, I noted that I had only said about 14 words to him, and for the rest of the time I listened attentively while he rabbited on.
     
     This was a very important lesson for me to take note of that it truly does not matter what people think about us, for that is not our concern; it matters more how we feel about ourselves.
 
     
     
     So when someone asks you "Who are You?" you can always choose to smile your widest grin and baffle them with, “I Am Joy","I Am Peace", "I Am Love" or feel free to use one of my favorites,“I Am Extraordinary!”
 
     
     But when you proclaim your "I Am" in this way just be prepared for others who are stuck in the old paradigm of identifying themselves solely by what they do and produce, to gaze at you in awe and secretly want what you are having.



Choosing to remain 'extraordinary' until next newsletter, I bid you..


Love and Angel Blessings,
Candy XXX 
Claire Candy Hough
Author of ‘Angels of Faith’
Licensed Reiki Master/Teacher  // Angel Practitioner
International Radio Host // CEO of Angel Healing House
Ph: +61 831.277.3716
SKYPE: candy.hough

1 comment:

Glennis Cannon said...

It is astounding how we tend to undervalue who we really are. When asked the question " Who Are You " my mind goes back to being told not to be bold, do not blow your own trumpet , remember your manners !! Well from growing up with the reminders of good manners , I would answer who are you with saying I am Glennis , pleased to meet you ! I no longer have to have validation all the time from others though the ego steps in sometimes seeking more !
Loved reading your blog , is good to ask of self the question Who Are You and in so doing not have to pretend